Tag: Childhood

Evaluation

In relation to my project proposal, I feel that what I have produced was exactly what I set out to do. I spoke about how I wanted to present my work in a more creative way than what I previously have, considering sculptures as a way of doing this. The final piece I have produced for me creatively represents my photos, showcasing them in a contemporary way. Using a mixture of both photos and quotes is something I wanted to experiment with more since doing it within my last module, and I feel the combination of the two worked well within the sculpture. It visually allowed the images to breathe, creating a gap between the photos and therefore meaning the sculpture didn’t become to overcrowded. Although the project is personally to me, the text gave an insight into how I feel, which I feel the photos alone could not have done.

Creating a head to represent the idea of mental health was especially important to me, and feel that this was the right shape to create to represent my photos in a creative yet meaningful way. I am however disappointed with the execution of the sculpture slightly, as when hung up the sculpture appears stretched, not allowing the shape of the body to be fully seen.  Finding the balance between keeping the shape and allowing the layers to be far enough apart from each other to view the pictures was especially difficult. I could have got around the problem by making the sculpture a lot bigger, which would have allowed me to space the layers further apart without losing the shape. However, this was not realistic within the time and budget I had. The execution of the photos linked directly with the idea of mental health. I purposely didn’t present the photos neatly, ripping some of them to give a personal feel to the work. I would want to make it clearer next time that I used 23 layers to represent my age, something that I feel is important when understanding the work in a personal piece.

The work is intended to be presented within a gallery space, with the photos that appear within the sculpture chronologically being placed around the room. This allows the audience to see the photos clearly, with the sculpture hanging in the centre of the room. This means that it would be easy to see from all angles. If I had more time I would create a 3d sculpture of what the sculpture would look like in a gallery space.

Overall I was happy with the outcome of my project. I feel that it was quite an ambitious project regarding time and money but handled it well. My biggest disappoint is how stretched the sculpture looks when hung up, however this is something that I could not have overcome unless making the sculpture a lot bigger. Although the execution did not go exactly as I planned, I was pleased with the concept. The idea of sculpture and installation art is something that has really interested me during this module, and is something that I want to look into continuing with during the final module.

The images above show family members holding a photograph of me as a child. These link to the first layer of my sculpture which shows images from my childhood, looking back at a time where I did not suffer social anxiety and I felt helped.

Having family members holding an image of me as a child is their way of holding onto what I used to be. My social anxiety doesn’t just effect me, but those around me. The image acts as metaphor for holding onto hope that I recover from social anxiety, and therefore going back to my childhood.

I also experimented with family members holding a photographs of me at my graduation. I had the idea of pairing this with the quote ‘Are you proud?’.  For me, graduating from university was one of my biggest achievements as I suffered badly from social anxiety during this time. The fact that I went onto finish the course and graduate was a proud moment for me, even though I struggled. Having family members holding onto a photo of me at my graduation, paired with the quote represents the idea of recovery, showing that even though there are difficult moments I can ‘beat’ the anxiety to hopefully make people proud.

I positioned each family member within the fame position which created consistency. I purposely didn’t show their faces, as a I wanted an anonymity to the work. It represents the loss of connection from me since I have suffered with anxiety, in comparison to the happiest times talked about previously during my childhood.

Photographs and quotes (Layer 1+2)

‘You grow up hearing everybody say, ‘she’s just quiet’.  The school reports claiming, ‘Kirsty doesn’t speak much in class’. And everyone tells you that’s it’s just a phase. You’ll soon grow out of it and everything will be okay. But what if you don’t grow out of it. What if growing up means you get worse? You surround yourself with family because it’s the only comfort you can find. For a while you’re happy. You have a happy childhood, but there is always something missing. You look back on childhood photos and think, where did it all go wrong?’

I plan to have each layer alternate between quote and text, creating a narrative of my life the further you go up the sculpture. On the first layer I aim to have the quote above. It talk’s of how i’ve always been quiet, yet at some point this progressed into social anxiety. I discuss the things that used to make me feel comfortable, such as family. Yet how surrounding yourself with family isn’t enough.

On the next layer with the photographs above. These link with the quote, reflecting on my life as a child. It especially ties in with ‘You look back on childhood photos and think, where did it all go wrong?’ I always struggle to think of a time where I didn’t suffer with anxiety, and therefore think at my what point in my life was there a turning point where I went from just being quiet to having a mental illness.